Sunday, 16 October 2011

Awards and Questions

As I thought of the best way to resume blogging, I started thinking about what would be the best post to publish first.
I then decided it would be best to respond to the Versatile Blogger award that I have been awarded by Luciano and  Nightingale

Many thanks to both of you and my apologies for the delayed response.

Fortunately/ unfortunately, I did something similar to this here: 
However, in the spirit of sharing, I will share 7 things that worry me about today's Nigerian society (including Nigerians living abroad) :

1. Being famous is now a goal? 
If you ask some kids what they want to be in future, they will answer....'I want to be famous'. More often than not, if you then ask them 'Famous for what?'; they are likely to say 'I dont know' or 'I just want to be a celebrity'. I beg to ask what we are doing wrong as parents and role models when kids today don't even talk about aspiring to be inventors, scientists, writers or artists.............

2. Knowledge is so underrated !
When I was younger, I grew up around a university campus.  While I knew that academics were more often than not poorer than most businessmen; I admired the knowledge they had. However, I do feel that our Nigerian society totally disrespects the real academics/ knowledge seekers amongst us. A society that does not reward intelligent and inquisitive minds is not ready to grow.

3. Academic qualifications can be overrated !
I cannot tell you how many times I have come across Nigerians who have a string of degrees and academic qualifications ........without any work experience. This may be acceptable in some fields - i.e. research. However, as someone who works in Education/ Training, I have to say that most employers prefer experience and great personality instead of a suitcase of redundant degrees

4. Priorities are skewed for most young ladies............
Who is the slimmest? Who has the richest boyfriend? Who has the richest dad? Who has the most friends on facebook? Who has the latest designer bag? Who was invited to the wedding-of-the year? Whose skin is lightest? Whose hair is 'on point'? Who has only sons? Who has had only daughters? 
Sometimes, when I listen to young ladies talk, I almost feel like we have taken a step back in time - to a time when women were expected to be ornaments and appendages. Dont get me wrong, I love fashion and looking good but even my late grand-mother sounded more empowered than most of our young ladies today. If this is the way forward......I shudder. *sigh* All I can say to such ladies is 'Get smart the saying goes - 'Beauty fades but dumb is forever' 

5. Priorities are skewed for most young men..........
Who has the 'baddest' car? Who has 'hit it big time'? Who has married a rich man's daughter? Who wears designer items? Who buys the most champagne in the club? Who has built the biggest house?
Again, dont get me wrong, I love a good ride and a man who knows how to enjoy life...However, when a man knows how to SPEND money and not how to MAKE money...we have a problem.

6. The more things change, the more they remain the same !
It has been said that 'There is nothing new under the sun'. This is certainly true when one looks at societal trends:
Most of the people who criticised past Nigerian military governments are now in power? Are they any better?
The young girls who criticised their mothers for succumbing to negative cultural dictates are now wives and mothers themselves....Are they any stronger? I think not.
The young boys who criticised their fathers for disrespecting their mothers with serial adultery are now husbands themselves ...................Have they chosen a different path? In most cases...........NO

7. Will blurred identities mean blurred visions?
Blurred = Something that is hazy and indistinct to the sight or mind
Personal Identity how a persons identifies him/herself
Cultural Identity = A person's self-affiliation (or categorization by others) as a member of a cultural group
National Identity = A person's belief in membership of a nation
No man can be an island and we are all influenced - in different ways - by music, religion, television etc
As Nigerians travel more and are exposed to more influences, I do wonder what the 'Nigerian identity' will be like in future.
Who could have predicted a 'Karen Igho' ten years ago? I like 'progress' as much as the next man but as my people say ' River wey forget im source go run dry' (A river that forgets its source will surely run dry)

So, a big thank you to Luciano and  Nightingale for the award. I do appreciate it. 

Do share anything that makes you worry about today's Nigerian society................Thanks for always coming over xxxxxxxxxxx


  1. I swear you are one of the most knowledgeable people I have ever come across, you just make too much sense. lol
    This is well said, in fact I have nothing to add or subtract, you have said it all. I especially love the part about priorities for my generation, you hit the nail perfectly on the head. I know people who don't want to marry men who are "Liabilities" yet they are not doing anything to make sure they themselves are not. ooooo Kudos to you NIL.

  2. I agree with you that our young men and women have derailed from what is real. Fantasy and make believe world reign supreme. I think it is difficult for some to understand the pursuit of knowledge because like you mentioned no one appreciates it.

    Personally, i hope our society would begin to repair the decay from inhouse as opposed to continually blaming the govt for everything.

  3. @9jaFOODie
    Seriously..thanks for the compliment.
    I have to say that most things I say are things WE KNOW but..............prefer to ignore.
    I loved your statement - 'I know people who don't want to marry men who are "Liabilities" yet they are not doing anything to make sure they themselves are not'
    MY SISTAH!!!! No be small ting.
    *folding my arms acros my chest*
    No be small ting o
    Have a blessed week

    *Nodding* re ' Fantasy and make believe world reign supreme'
    I feel you regarding ' begin to repair the decay from inhouse'............I guess that's where parenting comes in?
    Thanks my sistah
    Wise words as always!
    have a blessed week

  4. Thanks for sharing 9jamum. I agree with what you wrote. I worry about how Nigerians have accepted mediocrity and incompetence in every area of society. That gives me headache. The way people have passively accepted the rubbish our government does is mind-blowing. I always wonder when Nigerians will stand up and say enough is REALLY enough; we deserve better policies, competence, justice, and reduced corruption.

  5. Welcome..Nice post...Makes alot of sense..I like your last point alot. I wonder what Nigeria will be in the future too..

  6. hmmmm *deep sigh* It's rather sad how we as Nigerians are plagued by the 'band-wagon' effect. That originality and cultural values our parents had is fast going into extinction all in the name of civilization.

    You spoke well NIL. All we can do is to be the good examples in our own little way and ensure our children don't fall prey to this decay of moral values. God help us.

  7. You are making so much sense!!!

  8. Very true....but sometimes i think it all boils down to the way a child is raised. If in your home, making appearances was more important than instilling values, you'lld most likely grow up with that mentality and have friends who share the same view. I think parenting has gone very very very wrong.

    Let me give you a quick e.g. My friend's mum called her few days back (i'm in the UK) asking her why she still hasn't found a man even though we are through with our masters. That doesn't she know what her mates are doing? That she should get pregnant if she wants to but she just shouldn't come back to Nigeria the way she departed and how this person's daughter and that person's daughter is either pregnant or married. My mother on the other hand still tells me she'll tear my body with razor blade and add pepper if i come home pregnant without a man - UPBRINGING.

    Parents need to WAKE UP.

  9. NIL, no be small matter this celebrity thing. Reality shows are now the highest aspirations of young men and women. kill me quick!

    #4, 5, 6 the more things change, the more they remain the same. Its even more annoying to find that young females tend to scoff at 'feminists' when as women most of the freedoms we enjoy now was cause of the strong mothers we had.

    You certainly brought a versatile twist to this award. me likey!

  10. I always enjoy reading your posts cos the educator in you always shines forth. You deserved this award. I also love your twist and the way you have made me think about what we see in our society today. Most times i think it boils down to the family unit. The family unit has been destroyed. Where you have parents who leave the upbringing of their kids to house girls and nannies all in the bid to make money. I know money is important but the kids should not be abandoned too. All they know is what they see in tv. They see these people making money and being famous without education and they want it too. Welcome back.

  11. you said it all.
    we really need to start from our homes.
    welcome back

  12. 1. If they they insist on wanting to be famous, then, we have a duty to make sure channel their desire to be famous for the right (& progressive) things. Tis easier than challenging their famous dreams.

    2. We celebrate people with no 'deep' substance. So, tis only natural for knowledge to become underated.

    3. Most times, people pursue (further) academic qualifications without there relevance to their career goals (dreams) . As such, tis believed that multiple (additional) qualifications are superior to work experience.

  13. i keep trying to comment on ur blog but for some reason blogger won't let me.

    i agree with ur list... sigh

    i also tagged u on my blog- check my "blow your trumpet post"

  14. Nigeria's identity in the future is one of my greatest concerns. What will it mean to be a Nigerian in 20 years? I seriously shudder to think. We travel everywhere! A friend once said if you search every big company or organisation in the UK you will find at least one Nigerian there. But what are we taking back home??? We bring our expertise and scatter it around, yet we do not build up our country and we do not hold on tight to our cultural back ground. I mean, so many Naija's living abroad and the first thing a lot of them wanna drop is their accent (I mean totally!.) I personally see nothing wrong with speaking with a Nigerian accent. I'll respect you more for it. Acquiring an English/American accent by force makes you sound dumb!!! (I know I'm ranting now. sorry. Lol)
    But yeah, I do wonder what the future holds for my people.

    Great post NIL (as usual ;))

  15. What a lovely post to come back to. I really feel you with No. 4. Sometimes I wonder if we're taking steps backwards or forwards. Its funny to think that not up to even 100 years ago, women didn't have the opportunities to get a good education, work or even vote and now for some of us our biggest problem is whether it should be Indian, Brazilian or Peruvian.

  16. Thought provoking....I have many a times wondered world is not moving ahead anymore despite the technological advancement. People have shrinked their minds, shallow thinking is all over and disrespect to genuineness is what we see. Sigh!

  17. Great points in general but 2 and 6 are really on point for me. As for 7, i think a re-defined Nigerian identity is not a bad thing. Identities change and hopefully as part of the process, the most negative aspects fade out of the picture. I.M.O. we could do with an expanded understanding of what it means to be Nigerian, especially one that is less tribalistic.

  18. I am giving u HUG to say thank you.

    WHY: I know without a doubt by God's grace your children will grow to make a positive impact.

    I learn so much from reading your blog and I cant imagine what it would be like actually living under your roof just for an hour. I will be a professor by the

    You have so much great knowledge and understanding and I pray you will continue to impact it in a way that will change lives positively.

    THANK U again for this.

    I can only pray the hearts of men are convicted because the problem is not that we do not know... WE DO.

    The problem is we fail to ACT or at least fail to acknowledge in other to ACT or maybe simply afraid to STAND OUT and STAND for the TRUTH... we love our comfort zone and pattern.. shame

    I pray GOD will push us out to think outside the box and do things differently.


    God bless you too hun for making a difference...

  19. This comment has been removed by the author.

  20. NIL glad to have you back. uv just made my day with this post. I shudder to think what the future holds for Nigeria o. I'm an eternal optimist but somtimes eh...smh.
    I get that we have the most irresponsible set of leaders, in fact it pains me to think the generation that enjoyed the young Nigeria is the one killing Nigeria but we all have to do our parts and stop with the "e no concern me" attitude. We need a revolution.
    Upbringing can not be over emphasised o. A frnd was telling me about how her lil niece told her "shut up, you are stupid" and she was all smiles like what d kid did was cute. i know the little ones these days are very precocious and all but when a child say's somthing wrong, u are supposed to CORRECT her! smh for this new generation of parents o. I trust my mama, she'll slap dat potty mouth straight to China ni. Just 1 look is what she does..1 look and u'll 'park well'

  21. I totally enjoyed reading this post (as always). You are a real educator. Well done and welcome back!

  22. welcome back mum!!!

    nice post, as always.

    what i worry most about in the Nigerian society is the incessant growth of corruption everywhere.

    may God deliver us!

  23. Hmmmmnn thought provoking post. tis a call on everyone to sit up and do what is right at all times.

    NIL: Good to have you back. U're wellicomu!!!

  24. I haven't said welcome back yet so welcome back :) You were missed and thanks for this post. It's so easy to get carried away these days.

  25. Priorities are skewed for today's youth, i feel bad for my generation forreals lol.
    As for kids that want to be famous, i cant bllame them. Who wont want to be famous after watching MTV cribs where they show the huge mansions of famous people :'(

  26. Yeeeee NIL! Are you sure you are not the twin of mama Victoria - my grandmother from Oke-alafia? No? I could almost swear you were her o. This wisdom, I only attributed to her until I read this post. See me shaking my head vigorously like lizard under the sun as I read each point you've poured down so eloquently on the web. You are right o. Even that point about mothers whom we criticized for bowing to the dictates of the culture, I did that too. Now look at me with kids and I can confidently tell you that I've even surpassed my mom in terms of being "culturally inclined" LOL. Such is Life!

  27. "Most of the people who criticised past
    Nigerian military governments are now
    in power? Are they any better?
    The young girls who criticised their
    mothers for succumbing to negative
    cultural dictates are now wives and
    mothers themselves....Are they any
    stronger? I think not.
    The young boys who criticised their
    fathers for disrespecting their mothers
    with serial adultery are now husbands
    themselves ...................Have they
    chosen a different path? In most

    I can wholly relate to this!

  28. All the points here hit the nail on the head. For me, the most painful one is the one about girls, it's just heart breaking. What is happening to us?

  29. So so true! And you forgot, Who gets the hottest looking girl or guy? Esp the guys, who can brag about sleeping with the finest of them all.
    Misplaced priorities everywhere.
    It's so good to have you back N.I.L, I missed this

    Congrats on your award and I passed one to you myself

  30. OMG!!!!!!!!! Thanks for this post i was just thinking about writing about your no. 1... Like seriouslyyyyy this world has become something else o..

    Kids are no longer rewarded for being smart or innovative... most parents are struggle to put up youtube videos for the kids and hope that they would be discovered.

    Being smart is not even enough anymore.. its all about being hot and sexy.. I seriously pray for our kids.

    You hit all the points on the head!! Very nice post...

  31. This is so on-point.
    I am particularly worried about our lack of cultural Identity. It is so sad and I hope someday we will get there and appreciate our own culture and background.

  32. "A society that does not reward intelligent and inquisitive minds is not ready to grow", the reason Nigeria will not make progress or a long, long time.

    As someone who is also in education/training, I couldn't agree more with you. What a brilliant piece, abosulutely brilliant!

  33. This comment has been removed by the author.

  34. I am totally with you on this one; our priorities are just too shallow. Knowledge is now a phase, and no longer a process; maturity, now the luxury of a few, as anybody with a BB is considered to be BIG.Countless half-baked brains emerge from our universities.The ones who rush in aren't any better, 'children' who know nuffin about life flood our campuses, everybody wants to go to school and acquire huge stacks of certificates,the essence of EDUCATION is disregarded, and what used to be KNOWLEDGE is nuffin but embellished naivety; what we have now are brains that are polished, but actually empty.

    How would change come when we keep reserving today's problems for the leaders of tomorrow to take charge of? Tomorrow never comes, as we keep moving if fading cycles; change seems so familiar,and inventions only refine the initial problem,d same problems our parents faced, we inherit in two fold.

    I weep for today's youth, I weep for Nigeria.

    N.I.L, you said it all, you spit out obvious truths we'd rather overlook or just naturally accept as "one of those things." Thanks for sharing.

  35. Brilliant, this is just it i agree with you all the

  36. It feels good to be back here again. I totally agree with you and ofcourse you deserve the award.

  37. NIL, I absolutely love your post, this is probably the most versatile response to this award i've seen.
    Firstly, i think we've failed young people today by not being their role models in the first place. Most of them are raised by telly and celebs, so...i guess in that sense their aspirations are not shocking.
    Women berating one another is a time old fashion, i doubt it'll stop though, there's industries capitalising on women hating on one another like this... and the men? i've heard of people having more money than sense, but it has to be said there's those who have no money and no sense at all...
    the degree thing for some people is not by choice- well sort off, some folks travel abroad and get degree upon degree until the immigration rules permit them to naturalise in those nations. As they say, na condition de make crayfish bend...

  38. This is a great take on the seven things. I think the famous one has been an affliction for a long long time

    Muse Origins

  39. All 7 are very true. I find that when people work hard for their money and when they are armed with a good dose of common sense, they tend not to fritter it away on mindless purchases. Just about everything bothers me about Nigeria, but really the state of education and the lack of creativity in gospel music particularly bother me.

  40. i must say number 6 is soooo on point. i always said if i had a university, it will be a skull where people can learn unusual skills, like animation, inventing stuffs, manufacturing, farming, etc..children should know that there are other things than just being famous.
    love all the 7 points.

  41. I fear the way technology and media are growing rapidly together, if care is not taken on time, our culture may not only fade out completely but may be rehashed for us in the most degradable manner.

  42. Hope you are doing good? Come back quick o.

  43. NIL I hope you okay oh? how are your kids and hubby..Please take care and will miss you..xx

  44. Apologies accepted but i noticed your off again......yyyyyy

  45. NIL! Missing you. Hope you and yours are all doing good. xx

  46. NIL o!!!! Oya show na! abi which one u dey?! U wan dey hoard all that your plenty plenty knowledge, kwa?!
    No worry, we go smoke you out!

  47. NIL!!! Where you dey? A beg come update joo. Hope you and yours are well.

  48. MIA again ni. You're probably busy and all but a "hi i'm fine, no worries and bye" is enough #wink
    Hope all is well and ur prepping for xmas. Merry xmas in advance

  49. Knock! Knock!
    How are you? I believe all is fine! Season greetings! Stay blessed!

  50. Naija Mum - where art thou?! you are missed! hurry back please, we need wisdom!!

  51. I hope all is well. I guess you're busy... I'm just wondering.. hope you haven't left us permanently

  52. Merry Christmas to you and your family.
    Hope everything is well with you?

    Congrats on the award!

    I actually had a first hand experience myself, the child kept saying "I want to be great when I grow up". "Great as what?" and he had absolutely no idea lol

  53. Merry Christmas and a wonderful new year to you and your family

  54. N.I.L... wherez you? You've been M-I-A for too long. I hope you good and the family is very well too?

    Compliments of the season..miss you !

  55. Compliments of the season NIL, hope you had a great Christmas. Waiting patiently for you to resume blogging, meanwhile here's wishing you a very happy 2012.

  56. Thanks to all who left comments, checked up on me and bothered to come by............Happy New Year and God blessings in 2012


I always look forward to reading comments from visitors - so please leave yours. Many thanks for dropping by....xoxoxox