Thursday, 23 June 2011

My Dearest Pickin

Inspired by Naija parents dealing with badly behaved children abroad


My dearest pickin*
Wetin you learn today
for your spree spree* school?
Una learn to play
or.......how to look cool?

I see you learn well well
how to behave like fool.
And even open mouth tell
me.......say I be 'old school'.

I see say you no fit pass
Maths and English.
But you sabi harass
your classmates and teachers 

I even see say you get zero
when dem give una test.
Yet you be hero
to your useless friends

The other day you complain
say you go call olopa*
because I bring out my special cane
to whip you yeye* yansh*

My dearest pickin
I rather die
Than to see you begin
become thief and lie lie.

So, abeg come carry phone
because I ready to go prison
I no wan leave you alone
but my cane go make you see reason.
My dearest, yeye pickin

*pickin: child
*spree spree: speaking with a foreign accent
*olopa: police 
*yeye: nonsense, stupid
*yansh: backside

52 comments:

  1. See poetry! LOL! E be like say "dearest pikin" go chop cane well well today...

    But it's necessary now, so that "dearest pikin" doesn't turn to "jailed pikin" or "detained pikin."

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  2. When i was growing up, what the 9ja parents did when their kids were Acting VERY disorderly was to sent them back home to Nigeria to some intense boarding school....and for the most part it worked.

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  3. Loves it! The Bible says in Yoruba that ' were di si okan omode, pasan la of fi naa jade"!

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  4. My comment disappeared! Love it, love it, love it. Hilarious, and lyrical too. Nice one :)

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  5. lol.. i really like this one lmao

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  6. LOL... Peotichillarity!

    Gosh, thumbs up for you, you even created rhymes while at it LMAO

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  7. LOOOOL....hahahaha I should incoporate this poem into my family when I marry and have kids...

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  8. lol @ the last part..reminds me of a relative who was in the same situation. The child actually called police and it was sad because this was someone that used to live in naija and not born and bred there.nice poem..i like the pidgin style

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  9. laugh wan wound me oooo!.....ha! 9jamum!... but nah truth you nack o jare! i go flog shege for any pickin nah try that nonsense with me o!

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  10. Hmm Naija mum hmm, I usually hear of such kids overseas but I won't say I'm so informed. Since this subject is your pet project, :D lol take it up and let God guide ‎​‎​you. LOL

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  11. lol...this mama/papa ain't taking rubbish...anything to set the pikin on the right track.

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  12. oh girl,yhu make sense much,very hilarious,very cool,very true,yeye pikin should also receive a konk on their yeye neads :D
    thou rockest.
    pls check out my blog.

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  13. True, true... Make one pikin no come give person hypertension.

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  14. Huh? Where did my comment go?

    Oh well, like I said before, brilliant poetry. I love! Hehehehehe.

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  15. Even though this is so funny, it has a great lesson in it. Some children think that because they are going to school, their parents have nothing to say to them again.

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  16. lwkmd. See our own TigerMom in action!! Great rhymes NIL loving the zero/hero :)

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  17. seriously cracking up here :))
    oya take five ...*raises palm*

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  18. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  19. *Dead*
    N.I.L has killed me with laughter.
    See inspiration now. If I see this kind of poem on your table, before you even start the act, I'm gone for good 'cause I'm sure my *yansh may not survive it LOL
    Great job! I really loved the rhymes :)

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  20. hahahah!!! vERRRRRRy funny poem!! Awon obodo-oyibo children yh!? Lol--May God help us to do right with our kids o!
    Amen

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  21. LMAO! i wonder how my kids wld be like..i know i tease my parents a lot!

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  22. lmao the translation helped me
    i see the meaning behind it
    my mum tell my brothers something similar almost everyday.
    x

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  23. @Relentless
    Yes oh......'dearest' go def chop 'dearest 'cane' LOL
    LOL @"jailed pikin" or "detained pikin."
    My sistah................you see am.
    Thanks for dropping by
    I've zoomed over to your blog and I'll def be back again
    xoxoxoxo


    @9jaFOODie
    Sisterly.....my epic-chef
    Thanks for dropping by
    xoxoxox


    @Chizzy D
    *Nodding my head* re: '..........was to sent them back home to Nigeria to some intense boarding school'
    I know it worked for some......but that's too much of a risk to me oh
    I rather we battle it out together :)))
    Hope all is well with you my dear?


    @Ayodeji
    Glad you loved it
    I must admit my Yoruba is patch so.....but I believe I get the gist of what you wrote.
    Thanks for dropping by
    xoxoxoxo


    @Joxy
    Re: 'your comment'...I dont know what's wrong with blogger nowadays.
    Quite worrying
    Glad you liked the poem
    May our children only bring us peace and joy oh
    Amen

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  24. @Chizy K
    Glad you liked it
    How have you ben?
    xoxoxo


    @P.E.T. Projects
    *Thumbs up* re: Peotichillarity!
    Only you could have come up with something like that LOL
    Hope you are well
    Take care xoxoxox


    @Unveilinggold
    LOL @'I should incoporate this poem into my family when I marry and have kids'
    Please do oh.
    Discipline is neccessary :)))


    @Myne
    Yes oh.....very true
    Lion cub no go ever fit beat full grown lion :))))
    Thanks for dropping by
    Hope all is well


    @stelzz
    mmmm re '......it was sad because this was someone that used to live in naija and not born and bred there'
    The sad thing is that it is usually the half-and-halfs (pry & sec Naija and A levels & uni abroad) that usually misbehave. Sad.
    Thanks for sharing that.
    Much appreciated
    xoxoxo

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  25. @Ibhade
    LOL @...i go flog shege for any pickin nah try that nonsense with me o!
    I trust you
    unfortunately, a lot of parents abroad mis-interprete the laws and are even scared to tell off their kids.
    Thanks my sister


    @enybees-hub
    Thanks for the prayers
    Parents need it big-time
    Hope all is well with you?
    xoxoxoxo



    @JustDoyin
    LOL
    yes oh, my parenting mission statement is 'anything to set the pikin on the right track' LOL
    Hope all is well with you



    @gretel
    Thanks dear
    Good to have you visiting
    Yes oh re: 'should also receive a konk on their yeye heads' LOL
    That made me really laugh
    I have DEFINTELY been to your blog. I am now following and as you're on my blogroll.....I'll def be back
    xoxoxo



    @Blessing
    Thanks Blessing
    Hope all is well with you
    Do take care of yourself
    Lots of love xoxoxoxo

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  26. @os
    *Nodding my head* re:'Make one pikin no come give person hypertension'
    Abi my sistah
    Some pickin wahala tooooo much LOL
    Hope all is well with you


    @NikkiSho
    Thanks beautiful
    Hope you are well???
    take care of yourself oh.


    @Mimi B
    Re: your comment...I don tire for Blogger
    Honestly!
    Thanks for the compliment jare
    Glad you liked it


    @@ilola
    Yes oh re:'.........their parents have nothing to say to them again'
    That is the beginnning of craze abi?
    How are you my sistah
    xoxoxoxo



    @Dee!
    Yes oh re: 'Hilariously TRUE!'
    dem say na laugh person dey take tell im friend true abi
    thanks for dropping by my dear



    @Ginger
    LOL @ 'TigerMom'
    Yes oh...Ninja mum sef LOL
    Pickin no fit kill person
    Like you said .....when provoked zero go turn to hero in a flash LOL
    Thanks for dropping by
    I sincerely hope school is going well
    xoxoxo


    @LG
    Thanks oh re 'oya take five ...*raises palm*
    *Raising my own palms* LOL
    Thanks for dropping by my dear
    xoxoxo

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  27. @Pretty Lashes
    Glad you liked it
    Pickin no be joke oh LOL
    Hope all is well with you and plus one
    xoxoox


    @MsJB
    *calling ambulance* re Dead comment
    LOL @' If I see this kind of poem on your table, before you even start the act, I'm gone for good'
    The truth is that this kind of poem is usually written 'after the event'
    Provocation and Reason do not go hand-in-hand LOL
    Thanks for the compliment
    Much appreciated
    xoxoxo


    @Giagerry
    *Nodding my head* re: 'May God help us to do right with our kids o!'
    That na my prayer oh. Walahi
    Thanks for dropping by


    @kitkat
    LOL @'i know i tease my parents a lot!'
    I wonder why I'm not surprised about that??? *smile*
    Thanks for dropping by kitkat


    @MsNana
    LOL @'my mum tell my brothers something similar almost everyday'
    As I have 3 boys.....you can begin to appreciate my workload LOL
    Thanks for dropping by
    Hope all is well
    xoxoox


    @Dayor
    yes oh....very, very true
    No be small thing
    Hope all is well with you
    xoxox

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  28. Lol! I love it.
    When applied correctly, that special cane is truely a show of love. That one na beta mama.

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  29. My people say that a hen does not kill her chicks by stepping on them! Carry phone call olopa cos I ready go prison - I will tell that to my child any time any day he or she misbehaves!

    I love this post!

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  30. @Ope
    Glad you did
    Hope all is well


    @Lara
    *smile* @ classic
    Most Naija peeps (parents and kids) would have experienced this at some point :)))


    @ nutritionalert
    *Nodding my head* re: 'When applied correctly'..........yes oh
    There is a really fine line and physical reprimand should be used sparingly
    Thanks my sistah
    xoxoxo



    @ Emeka
    I loved the saying......'My people say that a hen does not kill her chicks by stepping on them!
    Yes oh....Discipline is necessary oh my brother


    @Boma
    Glad you liked it.
    Hope all is well with you

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  31. hahaha
    Our cane is called "goody goody"
    Imported specially from Naija. Works wonders!!
    Nice one sister
    xxx

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  32. This is hilarious!!! I love it! :)

    I just saw you were nominated for a Naija Blog award and I've voted for you! I hope you win in your category!!

    Have a lovely week!

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  33. heheheheh i love it! i have actually never seen or heard a poem in pidgin. that cane relevant o.

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  34. This is creativity at its best! Naijamum I hail o. If pickin no hear word, biko use the cane. Nice one

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  35. Lol...that was an interesting read*

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  36. Good ryhme Naija mum, Story well passed on. Make God help us raise proper kids oh. Any attempt to mess up for any kid, na serious cane be that. The bible sef talk am spare the rod and spoil the pikin.

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  37. @Gbemisoke
    LOL @ "goody goody"
    That really made me laugh.
    I'm sure it works wonders :)))
    Thanks my sistah
    xoxoxo



    @Vickii
    Glad you loved it
    ??? re: 'Nominated for the award???
    I have to go over to the site and find out
    I'm really flattered
    Thanks for the compliment


    @angelsbeauty
    Glad you liked it
    Re: 'never heard a poem in pidgin'....I know. it's not that common
    Yes oh re:'that cane relevant o' LOL true talk my sister
    xoxoxo


    @ Vyvyka
    LOL @'I hail o'
    Me sef I hail back. Area, how far???
    As you talk am '......biko use the cane' LOL
    thanks sis. Hope all is well with you.


    @ blogoratti
    Thanks for the comment
    I'll be visiting your blog asap
    Thanks for dropping by
    xoxoxo

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  38. @Amazing Thots!
    Amen oh re: 'Make God help us raise proper kids oh.' Yes oh
    That is a good prayer. We need divine intervention when it comes to raising kids properly
    Thanks sistah

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  39. I enjoyed that! Jokes aside, you make a valid point

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  40. @thewordsmythe
    Thanks sistah
    yes, re: 'Jokes aside'.....my people say 'na laff, laff person dey take talk true' *smile*


    @Daughter
    Yes oh. LOL
    Thanks for dropping by. I'll be checking your blog too.
    xoxoxox


    @H
    Glad you liked it
    Thanks for dropping by
    xoxoxo

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I always look forward to reading comments from visitors - so please leave yours. Many thanks for dropping by....xoxoxox